A D/s relationship is deeper then any other type of relationship out there. We trust deeper, love deeper and play deeper. Therefore when a D/s relationship ends the heartbreak can sometimes feel almost feel like the end of the world. A very good Domme friend of Mine, Cami, had been in a long term relationship with Her slave for exactly three years. he was under a lifetime contract and from the outside looked as if everything was beautiful with him. When in fact clearly it wasn't. They split a few days ago in a way that was not exactly kosher.

he had been lying to Her for the last year of their relationship. he was seeing a Pro-Domme on the side (This pro-domme was providing sex) because Cami has been undergoing Kemo for cancer of the lymph glands. Of course cheating would hurt anyone but a D/s cheating digs deeper then a vanilla one ever could.

So this post is to Cami. Know that I love You and know that it will get better. I heard this song to day and You of course came to mind. You are stronger then you know. he is just one of many.
I am here for You when You need Me. I won't press but You always know that I am a phone call, a drive, a bed away. If You need to drink, snuggle or simply cry You know My number Laverne. All You have to do is call Me.

"Irreplaceable"

To the left
To the left
Everything you own in the box to the left
In the closet, that's my stuff
Yes, if I bought it, baby, please don't touch

And keep talking that mess, thats fine
Could you walk and talk, at the same time?
And it's my name thats on that jag
So go move your bags, let me call you a cab

Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable

So go ahead and get gone
Call up that chick, and see if shes home
I bet you thought, that I didn't know
What did you think
I was putting you out for?
Because you was untrue
Rolling her around in the car that I bought you
Baby, drop them keys
Hurry up, before your taxi leaves

Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable

So since I'm not your everything
How about I'll be nothing
Nothing at all to you
Baby I won't shed a tear for you
I won't lose a wink of sleep
'Cause the truth of the matter is
Replacing you is so easy
To the left, to the left
To the left, to the left.
Everything you own in the box to the left
To the left, to the left.
Don't you ever for a second get to thinking
You're irreplaceable

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute
You can pack all your bags we're finished
'Cause you made your bed now lay in it
I could have another you by tomorrow
Don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable

Karma is a bitch Girly. Remember that.
Love You,
Shirley

Illuminating.

1.	to supply or brighten with light; light up.

2.	to make lucid or clear; throw light on (a subject).

3.	to decorate with lights, as in celebration.

4.	to enlighten, as with knowledge.

5.	to make resplendent or illustrious: A smile illuminated her face.

6.	to decorate (a manuscript, book, etc.) with colors and gold or silver, as was often done in the Middle Ages.

–verb (used without object) A friend of Mine described Me as that last night. I was flattered. Such a beautiful word. If I close My eyes and think about that word, it brings Me to a beautiful cabin in the middle of the woods. I am standing on the porch with a lantern high in the air. The cold December wind is ripping through the trees, howling as beautiful as a bell and all I can see is as far as the lantern shines.

I think we all need a light to guide us. Both Dominants and submissives have searched at some point, some of us still searching. It is a feeling of safety knowing that there is someone out there that holds that candle so that we may find our way home. Some of us get lost along the way. Some of us want to get lost along the way. Dipping into those realms that are darker then most. I enjoy the dark, yet I also enjoy knowing that I can find My way home.

I suppose all of My life I have been a lantern in one way or another. Guiding those around Me in most area's of life. I enjoy that role. It fills My heart knowing that I can be a guide, a light for those around Me.

I have spent My fair share of time in the light and My far share of time in the dark. I enjoy the darker realms. Places that very few will venture. Perhaps that is where My dislike of crowded spaces comes. Not as many people wandering around in the dark as in the light. My dark side, My Sadistic side, The side that most people do not find the "norm" of SSC is what drives Me. It is what makes My mouth water and My heart beat a bit faster. I have never went with the grain, stayed inside the lines. I was always the kid that colored the sky purple, the grass blue. Why see things the way they are? What not color life up a bit different then everyone else does?

Don't run with scissors. Why not? If you are careful, all fine.

Life is full of trial and error. Why worry about failing before you even start? If you do that you have failed right off the bat. So many of us don't realize that if we just let go there will be someone to hold our hand. There will be someone behind us to catch the fall. A shoulder to lean one when we are taken to places that most will never venture.

I wait for you.
I don't know why.
all I know is I can't hide.
at this temperature you could take over my mind.
like gossamer, you softly touch.
you draw me in,I'm powerless.
You possess an enchantment.
You call, don't know how I fell under Her spell.
I've been driven. you smile, an enchantment.

I wait for you.
I'm mesmerized this love is like a potion in disguise.
I'd tightrope walk with a blindfold on my eyes.
I can't escape, or so it seems.
I'd run away,Your in my dreams.
She possess an enchantment.

it's the kind of sleepwalk that never ends.
a type of loan with no dividends.
it's a game where you're given chase.
guess it could be called an acquired taste.
you know, I know, I call ,You go, i know.
this could be an enchantment.

Goddess Moon

What a busy holiday!

I swore that I would write before the holidays started yet that proved to be harder then I thought it would be. It seems as if things are not slowing down either. Which is a nice welcomed busy but still over all busy.

Santa of course was very good to Me. Then again I am and have been such a good Girl! I can hear Ya'll laughing and coughing from over here. Knock it off.

It does not matter how wonderful My holidays were, I always get very down afterwards. Of course that wonderful monthly time does not help either. I am one bitchy Domme. So to those that are in constant contact with Me, a word of advice.
Tread a bit lighter then usual.

We did not have a White Christmas here. That in itself would make anyone pissed off. For anyone who knows Me, knows that I thrive on the cold and the snow. Alas no luck.

So I thought I would post this picture with My blog this time. Looks sort of nice, since I can't have snow this will do.

It seems like forever since I have written here. When, in fact it has been awhile. Although I love this time of year, it does keep Me quite a bit busy. Not that My life is not always a busy run around but it has been more busy then normal.

I have family coming in from out of town tomorrow and from here on out things will be busier then even I can keep up with. Looking forward to it.

Ordered a new leather paddle about a month ago and finally got it yesterday. I love the company but they take too long to ship. It is fairly large across and has five holes in the paddle part. It is stiff now but I am sure someday will be worked through! It will loosen up once it hits a bottom or two. I also bought a pair of the cutest brown leather boots the other day. I sooo need to get a good digital camera to take a picture. They have a 3 inch heel and a square toe. Very comfy.

I wish I could sit here and have a lot to say. Alas, I don't.
Yet, I will make sure to write before the holidays come rolling around.

Blessed be,
Goddess Isis Moon

I loved this picture. There was something in it and about it that made Me take a deep breath in. A slave peeking out the window. Knowing it is only he and I.


My mood is very docile this morning.

I know that I have a million and one things to conquer yet I am not doing any of them and My guess is that I won't accomplish them until I really, really have to.

That darkness stirring inside of My head. Making it near impossible to focus My mind on anything else. So I am just taking the time to relish in those thoughts. That aching and stirring deep down inside of My gut. Making Me look at things differently, take a deeper breathe and devour those thoughts as often as I can.

There is nothing more beautiful then seeing light through the darkness. It is even more beautiful when you can see the darkness through the light. Many know not of what I speak. Most do not understand. Yet, for those that have sat inside the darkness they understand very well.

My sadistic urges are screaming out as well this morning. What I would not give for a few swings of the flogger. I do not even think it is the craving of it that I need so badly but the chance to let go of some of the frustration that is bubbling within My gut.


I heard this song today and felt the need to post it.

Under the ruins of a walled city

Crumbling towers and beams of yellow light

No flags of truce, no cries of pity

The siege guns had been pounding all through the night

It took a day to build the city

We walked through its streets in the afternoon

As I returned across the field's I'd known

I recognized the walls that I once made

I had to stop in my tracks for fear

Of walking on the mines I'd laid



And if I built this fortress around your heart

Encircled you in trenches and barbed wire

Then let me build a bridge

For I cannot fill the chasm

And let me set the battlements on fire



Then I went off to fight some battle

That I'd invented inside my head

Away so long for years and years

You probably thought or even wished that I was dead

While the armies are all sleeping

Beneath the tattered flag we'd made

I had to stop in my track for fear

Of walking on the mines I'd laid



And if I built this fortress around your heart

Encircled you in trenches and barbed wire

Then let me build a bridge

For I cannot fill the chasm

And let me set the battlements on fire



This prison has now become your home

A sentence you seem prepared to pay

It took a day to build the city

We walked through its streets in the afternoon

As I returned across the lands I'd known

I recognize the fields where I'd once played

I had to stop in my tracks for fear

Of walking on the mines I'd laid



And if I built this fortress around your heart

Encircled you in trenches and barbed wire

Then let me build a bridge

For I cannot fill the chasm

And let me set the battlements on fire                        

Goddess Isis Moon

Anyone who knows Me, knows that I am not a person who enjoys confrontation. I have always been more of a lover and not a fighter. Yet, today has proved that there are just sometimes that words can do much more then fists ever could. I also am never one to air My laundry but felt that this little bit I must. I believe it shows how ignorant people are about the realm of BDSM.

The day started out lovely. Did some holiday things and enjoyed Myself. As I was in one of the many stores that I walked into today I spotted someone who I would rather have not. My ex sister in law, whom I never got along with walked up to Me as if I was her best friend. I was polite. Answered the questions that she asked Me and went about My business trying to mark off My list of "Had to buy".

As I was then walking out of the store she says...
"I have a gift for you for the holiday, so I am going to swing by your house later"

I again, polite as could be answered.
"Lisa, I would rather you not. We have never really gotten along and I do not wish to start now"

She answered with a growl and an OK.

Let Me give you a bit of background.

She was the first person to be a constant questioning source about the way I live My life. Others come into My home, see Wicca books. See S/M books and books about Domination. No one questions it. My neighbors (Which are not near) never look twice when new people come into town or into My driveway. No one has come to Me and asked why I do the things that I do. Her questioning was not the problem. For I am more then happy to answer any questions that anyone may have with the way that I live My life. Her "questions", if they can even be called that where more attacks and remarks made to others in the family, strangers or outsiders.
When her and My brother in law divorced was when the shit started to truly hit the fan.
For Her prior stunts were simply icing on the cake.

She started to send Me filthy pictures, newspaper articles about "alternative lifestyles" (which usually meant someone going to the ER with a cucumber in the ass), letters that she wished to send to everyone that she knew. All of those things were fine with Me. Send anything you want. I am not, never have been and never will be ashamed of Me or the people around Me.

So, I returned home and within 30 minutes of My arriving home She pulled in the driveway. Had I not been outside unloading gifts out of My car I would have never answered the door. Without My inviting her in, she enters My home.

"Here" She growls throwing the gift at Me.

Politely again I say "No thank you"

Then it starts....

Her--
" I know all about you. I know that you do strange sexual things to men, that you practice witchcraft and that you live a lifestyle that is not acceptable."

Me--
"Not acceptable to who? you?"

Her--
"Not acceptable to the world. I know you are bi sexual too, which is just sick. You are leading your kids to the path of destruction."

Me-- (Now in her face)
"Don't you ever and I mean ever come into My home again, tell Me how to raise My kids or that My lifestyle is not acceptable. My kids are beautiful. What I do behind closed doors is not their business nor yours."

Her-- (Backing up)
"I know all about you and you are just sick"

Me--(Almost standing on top of her)
Her--(Tears start and She starts to stutter)

Me--
"Is there a problem Lisa? It looks almost if you may pee in your undies right now. You see, that is something that I would have a slave to just to embarrass him. Do you want to be embarrassed?"

Her--(Full tears)
"See you are sick"

Me--(Her face cradled extremely tight in My hand, Me pulling Her ponytail back as far as I can)
"Why thank you Lisa. For that is a compliment to Me. Now, My advice if you ever call Me, come to My house or even breathe in the direction of Me or My children, I will make your life a living hell. After all, that is My job."

Her--
"I understand. I don't know what I was thinking and I promise to never come here again."

Me--(Kissing her square on the lips) **Just to watch her gag of course**
"Good girl, now go"

I stood there for a moment and watched her drive away. I did not feel a sense of Dominance, yet I sense of sadness. Sad that there are so many people like her in the world that truly do not understand that D/s is not about sex. It is not about torture or whips. Yet, embodies the deepest love and commitment that vanilla people will never ever achieve. I felt sorry for her. Sorry that her life is so boring, so sad that she felt the need to come and needle into Mine.

I am very careful about what My children hear. What they see and what they know. I am as open with them as I can be, as they are still very young. Yet, I want them to understand that even though someone is not what the world considers "normal", they are okay. It is what makes them special. It is what makes them..... real.

Blessings,
Goddess Moon

I am not exactly sure why I feel so down today. Perhaps, some of it has to do with lack of sleep lately. I seem to be only getting about 2 hours at a time and hopefully when I hit the doctors on Tuesday, they can help a bit. Tis finally cold outside and winter is settling in. Nothing in the word makes Me happier then the cold and wind. Not gonna write much just thought I would say a few words..... So... A few words. Will write later until then Asta Pasta Goddess Moon